Once you’ve joined the club of swimming pool owners, certain truths about pool lifestyle become self-evident. Over my years as a member of this backyard-living, pool-owning club, these things have proven themselves to be true over and over again. Whether you currently own a fiberglass pool or you’re ready to take the plunge with a new inground pool, you’re sure to get a kick out of this list of 43 interesting things that all pool owners eventually come to know.
- Water always goes cloudy the day before a big party.
- Farts float (according to my grandson).
- The meaning of the terms “pH” and Total Dissolved Solids.
- It’s better to buy quality than cheap.
- It always rains 2 inches after you have added water with your garden hose.
- Blow-up toys usually last about two weeks (if you are lucky).
- Don’t ever say “Feel free to use the pool anytime.” They will.
- There’s no such thing as enough towels.
- Never walk barefoot on a deck or driveway that the sun has been baking all day.
- There always needs to be someone outside the pool to chase the ball.
- Never show your kids how to turn on the pool heater.
- Always check the water temperature before entering the pool.
- Water spouts and floating fountains are mesmerizing and a great stress-reliever.
- Small, round rocks are impossible to dig out of the deep-end.
- Skimmer baskets catch some amazing things.
- You acquire friends you never realized you had before buying a pool.
- Grass clippings are a bear to get out of the pool. Foot baths for kids are required.
- Never try to go down a dry slide. Literally can’t be done.
- You actually own (and will at some point probably use) a lifeguard whistle.
- You really can get sunburned on what seems to be a cloudy day. In places you never imagined.
- All concrete decks eventually crack.
- There is no such thing as a chemical that turns color if a kid pees in the pool (but don’t tell the kids that.)
- Never take glass of any kind into the pool area. (Doesn’t matter if you’re “careful”).
- You find yourself yelling the phrase “STOP RUNNING” on a regular basis.
- You’re obsessed with water safety and require “swimmies” or life jackets on kids until they prove themselves.
- Ducks and geese will always choose your pool over the pond.
- Your kids, who promised to clean the pool EVERY DAY, need reminding EVERY DAY.
- It’s always a good idea to shock your pool after the little league has been in it.
- You tell your teenage daughter the best way to get a tan is to vacuum the pool.
- You have plastic runners from the back door to the bathroom.
- Even with a pool, the kids occasionally like to play in the sprinkler.
- You can (and have been known to) jump fully clothed in the pool after mowing the yard on a humid 80-degree day.
- The mysterious object at the deep-end of the pool is your sunglasses.
- You firmly believe that no child gets to swim without supervision. EVER.
- Kids will get in 65-degree water in April, but complain if it’s not 85 degrees in June
- When walking down the steps into the pool water there is a “special depth” that requires hesitation.
- It is a proven fact that birds will fly 200 miles just to poop on your pool deck.
- Basketball is the best game to play in the pool. Volleyball requires a crowd.
- The decibel level of a kids birthday pool party is louder than anything you could possibly imagine.
- You should invite your goofy neighbor to pool parties, or your guests might see him burning leaves in his underwear. (I know this from experience.)
- Sitting by the pool is almost more relaxing than floating in it.
- Having a pool in your backyard makes you feel like you’re on vacation every day.
- When you walk into the backyard, your pool will never fail to make you smile.
These are just a few of the pool lifestyle things that every pool owner knows. The joys of backyard summer living poolside are too many too count. I’ll add more as time goes by and I’m sure you have some of your own. (Now, just imagine that if anyone ever Googles “do farts float,” they may get to read this blog.) And if you’d like to join the club of pool owners, give my friends at Thursday Pools a shout. They can hook you up.
With that in mind it is time to go enjoy my own pool. Have a great and safe pool season. Until next time…
-The General